How to Fix the Poor Communication in Your Marriage

Posted on: 27 April 2016

Marriage is no easy thing. You have to work at it every day, and, truthfully, what might work for one couple might not work for another. But just because you fall on hard times, this doesn't mean that you don't have a relationship worth salvaging. In many instances, the thing can cause a marriage to break down is a lack of communication, or poor communication. After all, if you can't let each other know how you feel, how can you ever really work to resolve each other's problems or be on the same page? Here are some ways that you can improve the communication in your relationship.

Schedule time for communication. When you form any new habit, there are many strategies that can help you stick with it, and something very powerful is the strategy of scheduling. If you put a dreaded work task you don't want to face in your work calendar, you are more likely to tackle it head on instead of avoiding it. The same goes for communication in a relationship. Both you and your partner might be resistant to talk to each other openly on a regular basis, but if you put it in your calendar, you'll become accustomed to communication so that it actually becomes a habit you don't even have to think about.

Use written communication as well. Some people are more comfortable speaking and some people are more comfortable writing things down. At some point or another, you will need to have a face-to-face conversation, but to get to that place, writing down the things you really want to say could be a good way to open up a little. When your scheduled communication time comes, you can bring your list with you, and hopefully talk more freely about the things that are bothering you.

Seek the counsel of a third party. Sometimes, nothing will do but the help of someone objective, and marriage counselling can really help in this instance. Say, for example, that you have scheduled communication time but you and your partner keep butting heads because you have stubborn personalities. In this case, a trained professional could have the expertise to actually get to the root of your communication problems when you just don't have the energy or resources to do so yourselves. A marriage counsellor will also be able to give you additional communication strategies to try at home.

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